In a culture that glorifies hustle and productivity, rest can feel like a guilty pleasure, something to be earned only when we’ve ticked off the to-do list, met everyone else’s needs, and proven ourselves busy enough. But what if rest isn’t a reward, but a requirement? What if making time for rest isn’t indulgent, but essential for wellbeing, clarity, and sustainability?
Many of us still struggle to prioritise rest in our daily or weekly rhythms. Whether you’re a parent, carer, professional, student, or all of the above, making space for rest can feel like a luxury you can’t afford.
But here’s the truth: you can’t afford not to.
Why Rest Matters (and It’s Not Just About Sleep)
Rest isn’t just about getting a good night’s sleep, though that’s important too. Rest is the intentional act of pausing, slowing down, and allowing your nervous system to recalibrate. It’s about moving from “doing” to simply being.
Chronic stress and constant busyness activate our body’s fight-or-flight system. Over time, this can lead to burnout, anxiety, low mood, irritability, difficulty concentrating, and even physical illness. Rest gives the body and brain a chance to switch into the parasympathetic nervous system, the “rest and digest” mode that supports healing, digestion, emotional regulation, and creativity.
Research shows that regular periods of rest improve memory, decision-making, productivity, and even immune function. Rest also allows space for self-reflection, creativity, and emotional processing, things that don’t often flourish in the noise of daily life.
So why is it so hard to rest?
Why We Struggle to Rest
Many of us have internalised the belief that rest is lazy, selfish, or unproductive. We may have been praised for overworking, for “pushing through,” or for being endlessly available to others. Rest can stir up feelings of guilt, discomfort, or even shame.
For people in caring roles, those managing long-term health conditions, or anyone navigating systemic barriers (such as racism, ableism, or fatphobia), rest may not feel safe or accessible. It may also be unfamiliar, especially if rest hasn’t been modelled or prioritised in your family, workplace, or community.
If you’ve ever sat down and felt the weight of unprocessed emotions flood in, or the nagging sense you “should” be doing something else, you’re not alone. Rest requires not only time but permission. And that’s often the hardest part.
Seven Ways to Build Rest Into Your Day or Week
The good news is rest doesn’t have to mean a two-week holiday or spa day (though those are great too). Rest can be found in small, meaningful pauses, woven into the fabric of your day. Here’s how to start.
1. Redefine What Rest Means for You
Rest isn’t one-size-fits-all. For some, it’s stillness and solitude. For others, it might be gentle movement, creative play, or time in nature. Ask yourself: What feels replenishing? What helps me come home to myself? That’s your rest.
Try:
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Listening to a favourite podcast in bed
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Taking a slow walk with no destination
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Doing five minutes of stretching between meetings
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Saying “no” to an invitation if your body says “not today”
2. Schedule Rest Like You Would a Meeting
If it’s not in the diary, it often doesn’t happen. Block out time, even 10 or 15 minutes each day for something restful. Treat it as non-negotiable. Over time, you’ll re-train your mind to see rest as a priority rather than an afterthought.
Try:
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Adding a 30-minute “rest block” after work
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Setting a phone reminder to pause and breathe mid-morning
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Booking a regular “do nothing” slot at the weekend
3. Practise Saying ‘No’ (or ‘Not Right Now’)
Rest requires boundaries. That might mean limiting social plans, deferring tasks, or asking for help. Saying “no” to something else is often a necessary step towards saying “yes” to rest.
You are allowed to rest even if others are still busy. You don’t have to earn it. You don’t need to be exhausted first.
4. Create a ‘Rest Toolkit’
It helps to have a few go-to activities or tools you can turn to when you need rest. Build a personalised list that includes different types of rest (physical, mental, sensory, creative, social, emotional).
Example toolkit items:
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Eye mask and noise-cancelling headphones
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Favourite book or audiobook
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Herbal tea or essential oils
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Playlist for slow, calming music
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A friend you can call for a quiet chat
5. Disconnect to Reconnect
Phones, emails, and social media can keep our brains in “always-on” mode. Rest often requires us to disconnect from stimulation so we can reconnect to ourselves.
Try:
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A 20-minute digital detox each morning or evening
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A screen-free Sunday afternoon
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Turning off notifications during rest blocks
6. Rest With Others
Rest doesn’t have to mean being alone. Quiet, restorative time with others, like watching a film, sitting in silence, or walking slowly side by side, can be incredibly healing.
Try:
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Cuppa and a chat with a friend without an agenda
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Sitting quietly in a park together
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Attending a restorative yoga or breathwork class
7. Let Go of the Perfect Rest
You don’t need to wait for the perfect moment or the right mood. Rest imperfectly. Rest even if your house isn’t tidy. Rest even if your to-do list is long. Start small, and start now.
Where to Turn If You’re Struggling
If rest feels impossible, overwhelming, or unsafe, you are not alone. These UK-based services can support your wellbeing:
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Mind (www.mind.org.uk): Offers mental health resources, helplines, and local services for stress, burnout, anxiety, and depression.
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The Mental Health Foundation (www.mentalhealth.org.uk): Provides guides on rest, stress reduction, and creating balance in your life.
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Carers UK (www.carersuk.org): Supports unpaid carers with advice, respite services, and peer connection.
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Rethink Mental Illness (www.rethink.org): Offers information and support on managing mental health and accessing rest as part of recovery.
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Rest for Resistance (www.restforresistance.com): Though US-based, this online space uplifts marginalised communities and offers guidance on rest as a form of resistance, especially for BIPOC and LGBTQ+ people.
Final Thoughts
Rest is not laziness. Rest is not weakness. Rest is a human right.
It’s also a radical, restorative act, especially in a world that tells you to go faster, do more, and always be available. When you rest, you reclaim your energy, your worth, and your humanity. You remind yourself (and others) that you matter, not because of what you produce, but because you exist.
So pause. Breathe. Lie down. Say no. Switch off. Wander. Listen. Do nothing.
And then do it again tomorrow.
You are allowed to rest. You deserve to rest. Start where you are.
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Emma Mudge
Co-founder and Coaching Psychologist
BSc (Hons), PGCert, PGDip, MSt
Member of the British Psychological Society
& Division of Coaching Psychology – GMBPsS
EmPower You Psychological Services